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    Yes! On January 1, 2008, Solo Femininity officially morphed into Radical Womanhood, to more accurately represent the broader range of topics on this blog.
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May 15, 2008

'Of Course!'

Img_5952_2 Wherever I have gone in Addis Ababa, I have been asked if I like the city. I do! There's a crazy, frenetic energy to Addis (especially the way traffic flows here), but there's also a genuine warmth. People will meet your eyes and greet you in a way that doesn't happen in the cell-phone-gabbing, self-absorbed atmosphere back home. Some of the people I am traveling with were in Addis five years ago, and they can't believe how much the city has grown since then. I am told it is the fastest-growing economy in Africa that's not based on oil.

The guys on the video crew have learned a number of Amharic words (the language that is spoken here), but I've only mastered "e'shi," which means "okay." However, we have grown fond of Img_5965the Ethiopian way of answering in the positive during a conversation in English -- "Of course!" You have to say it with a rising inflection and draw it out a bit to say it like they do here.

When we were shooting in the Somali neighborhood I mentioned in the previous post, I encountered the little girl standing in the photo on the top left. She had an obvious eye infection (which isn't easy to see in this photo). Her left eye was practically closed. So we prayed for her, asking God to heal her. Some of the people here literally have nothing. Getting enough to eat is the big order of the day. Medical care is beyond their reach. So poor Christians must pray for healing and not look to any doctor to help them. As a result, their faith is often rewarded with amazing accounts of healing. I felt so helpless to offer this little girl any medical relief, but I could offer something far more significant by praying for her.

What's surprising to me is how much joy and happiness exists even in these deprived conditions. The little girl standing with Drew, John David, and David in the picture top right hung around as much as possible. She always smiled her shy little smile while invading our personal space. It's hard to walk away from such appeal. Img_5986_2Seeing the kids in poverty is hard. You just want to scoop them up and take them all home. No wonder we keep seeing so many couples with their newly adopted Ethiopian children in our hotel.

Yesterday, we interviewed pastors Mo Adugna and Wondy Getahun in the Entoto Mountains overlooking Addis. It's hard to see in this photo, but the city is sprawling in the distance behind them. We were surrounded by eucalyptus trees. I don't think I've ever seen a live tree--just the dried ones among home decor collections. The live ones are fairly redolent, too.

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In the afternoon we did some shooting on the street, which attracted a number of hopeful people who thought we might be able to give them lots of money because of our camera. I was concentrating on my shot list when I heard John David and Andrew say goodbye to someone.Then I saw John David pull the shirt off his back and give it to his new friend, who smiled broadly and clutched his new treasure to his chest. The guys on the crew have been incredible about reaching out to people here, spending time with them and giving them little gifts. They spent their first day in Addis befriending a group of young boys and ended up buying shoes for them. Now every time we pull into the hotel parking lot, these kids appear as if out of the mist, running and waving, eager to catch the attention of the guys in our van.

There's so much more to say, but few words flow at a late hour. We've got several more days in Addis, so I hope I can post more photos before we go.

May 13, 2008

AH-dees AH-ba-ba

Img_5881 When we landed Friday night in Addis Ababa, we had narrowly missed being caught in a civil war. Our flight had landed earlier that afternoon for a refueling stop in Khartoum, Sudan. I had hoped to get off the plane and take a picture of my feet on Sudanese soil, for I figured I would never get a chance to go back. Instead, we were warned to stay in our seats and not take any photographs.

The next day, Darfur rebels attacked Khartoum and the airport (and air traffic control) were closed, taken over by the Sudanese military. Suddenly the airspace over this vast nation was also unavailable to passing commercial flights. We knew nothing of this until we received an email from Doug Hayes, executive director of Covenant Mercies, who was flying to Addis to meet us for a video interview. His plane had been held in Amman, Jordan, until further notice.

Img_5924 Ignorant of this problem, we found that our first reaction to Addis upon arrival was dizziness and confusion. Addis Ababa sits at about 8000 feet--high enough to notice the thin air when you land or try to move quickly. Thus, the dizziness. The confusion came about when the Ethiopian Customs agents politely refused entry to our video cameras. We needed to obtain a special permit from the Ministry of Information to bring in our gear and there would be a small fee. Of course, this office wouldn't be open until Monday, so without our cameras, we enjoyed a restful weekend. All the needed paperwork was processed smoothly on Monday morning, however. By Tuesday, we had everyone and everything we needed to proceed with our filming.

Img_5967 We spent Tuesday with Doug and Aman, a pastor at our church here in Addis, Covenant Life Church. Aman coordinates the child sponsorship program that the church runs in conjunction with Covenant Mercies. We visited a poor neighborhood composed mostly of Muslim Somali refugees, where more than a dozen children are currently sponsored. (The older girl in the picture at left is one of the children in Covenant Mercies' program.) I think we met nearly every person in the neighborhood--our cameras always draw a curious crowd here. In general, people are very respectful. It's polite to acknowledge everyone you meet with a small bow. Close male friends will bump chests three times and close female or male-female friends or family will air kiss each other three times in a left-right-left pattern.

I have so many other observations about Addis (I believe the correct pronounciation is what's shown in the title), but the photos are taking a long time to upload, so I'll call it quits for now. Lord willing, more photos will be added in the near future.

Photos: Khartoum as seen from the airplane; a view of Addis taken from the Ministry of Information; a family of a child sponsored by Covenant Mercies (mother, toddler, sponsored child, and grandmother).

A Walk to Beautiful

What a wonderful convergence. I've been reading a book that was lent to me titled, The Hospital by the River, by Dr. Catherine Hamlin, while I've been in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Tonight, May 13, PBS is airing an award-winning documentary on NOVA called, A Walk to Beautiful, which is about the work done by the doctor in this book. I've set my DVR and look forward to watching it when I get back. The story is set in Ethiopia's capital, Addis Ababa, which is why I'm eager to see it. Here are some details about the film from a press release:

Haml05 The film tells the personal stories of rural women who make their way to Addis Ababa, seeking treatment for obstetric fistula, a life-shattering complication of childbirth that was once common in the pre-industrial United States but that is now relegated to the poorest regions of the world. In Ethiopia alone, there are an estimated 100,000 women suffering from untreated fistulas. Shot in a starkly beautiful landscape, the film juxtaposes the isolated lives of village women who are outcasts because of their medical condition, with the faraway hospital that offers a miracle after a long and arduous trek--a "walk to beautiful."

Women with small pelvises, whether due to malnutrition, overwork, or because they married too young, are most at risk, since there is often not room for the baby to emerge during birth. The result can be an obstructed labor that may last up to 10 days, a stillborn baby, and a trauma-induced hole, or fistula, in the vaginal wall that produces chronic incontinence. The women profiled in A Walk to Beautiful are treated as virtual lepers in their villages, where they are shunned by family and made to live alone. One woman admits to contemplating suicide.

Through chance they learn that there are other women who share their affliction, and that the Addis Ababa Fistula Hospital exists to help them, if they can manage to walk for hours to the nearest road, find public transport to the capital, and then search out the hospital in a strange and forbidding city. Once there, they enter a haven that they never imagined, surrounded by women like themselves and a medical staff of Western and African doctors who treat them like human beings, not outcasts.

Dr. Hamlin is a Christian from Australia who came here with her husband. He died in 1993, but she remains in Addis to serve these women.

"My husband and I came to Ethiopia in 1959," she says. "The previous gynecologist that we replaced said to my husband, 'The fistula patients will break your hearts.'"

I hope I will be able to visit this hospital during my trip. But if not, I am eager to finish the book and watch the documentary when I get home. I pray that it is a good witness and an encouragement to those who watch it. You can read more about this documentary and see images from the area on the NOVA website.

May 12, 2008

Contentment: Believe the Best About ... God

Greetings from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia! We arrived here late Friday night and are still sorting through some travel glitches. But we enjoyed a great Sunday with the people of Covenant Life Church of Addis Ababa. I hope to have photos and travel commentary posted in the next few days. In the meantime, here's something about contentment that I read before I left. I wrote this post in advance--and my ruminations about the possible application while traveling have all proven to be true! So glad to be reminded once again...

80553_1_ftc_dp I've just finished reading Lou Priolo's book, Pleasing People: How Not to Be An Approval Junkie. I thought it would be quite similar to another favorite book of mine on the same topic, Ed Welch's When People Are Big and God Is Small--but it wasn't. It was similar in the sense of being God-centered and Bible-based, and obviously several of the counseling principles were the same. But there was enough of a difference in voice and illustration to make this a fresh read on a perennial topic. In the weeks that I've been slowly digesting it in my quiet times, I've found the Holy Spirit has brought it back to mind on several occasions--helping me to see where I was guilty of some of the points in the book.

I especially appreciated one point toward the end of the book about contentment. Lou succinctly makes his point in one sentence, and then unpacks it: "Contentment involves putting the best possible interpretation on God's dealings with you."

First Corinthians 13:7 says that love "believes all things.' That means that we are to believe the best about others. In other words, if there are ten possible interpretations or explanations for why someone took a particular course of action, nine of them being evil and only of them being good, the loving person will, in the absence of contradictory evidence, choose to reject the bad and believe the good. Now, if we are commanded to view other sinners with this kind of optimism, how much more should we interpret God's dealings with us in the best possible light? How much more should we forsake the harsh interpretations of His providence in our lives and accept the good ones?

I have a feeling I will need to remember this while in the midst of traveling glitches and other issues that can tempt a stream of complaints. I trust this gives you a different perspective on your circumstances today, as well. Praise be to God who gives us far better than we deserve!

May 08, 2008

Ministering in the Land of the Reformation

Hamburg_027_3We've just concluded our last day in Germany. Today we went from the city of Hamburgers to the city of Frankfurters. I kid you not. We saw the signs and we laughed. (We are rather easily amused. And speaking of amused, check out this rollerskate of a car. It is the perfect urban vehicle. Why parallel park when you can perpendicular park?!)

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I really like Hamburg. It wasn't anything like I expected. When I arrived, I read it was the Venice of Germany--and with the port, lakes, and canal system, I can understand why. There is a lot of waterfront acreage there! Hamburg is in the top ten of my favorite cities. (It might rank higher if I spoke German, but that's my issue and not Hamburg's.) God gave us glorious weather. Everyone kept saying it's not like Germany. We were quite grateful.

Img_5832Our host, Wolfgang Wegert, was excellent company, as well. He must be an incredibly busy senior pastor, but he was so genial--it seemed like he had all the time in the world for us. One night he took us out for a steak dinner and the waitress stopped him to say hi. We later found out it was because of his TV show. His Sunday sermons from the Arche church are seen throughout Germany and into other parts of Europe, reaching somewhere between 50,000 to 100,000 people each week. He gave us an incredible interview in English, so I can only imagine how powerful he is while preaching in German.

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This weekend, Arche church is hosting a Bible exposition, the largest of its kind in Europe. I was able to see a bit of it while it was being set up. Incredible! I saw one of the original clay jars that held the Dead Sea Scrolls and a Bible from the early 1500s, from the time of Martin Luther. I wish I could have seen the rest of the displays.

Tonight we flew into Frankfurt, in order to connect here and fly out to Addis Ababa in the morning. We saw a little bit of the historic town center tonight and the commercial district on the way into town.

During dinner, we had a serious conversation about what we were learning during our personal devotions and other small group-style spiritual fellowship. Our earnest conversation caught the attention of four businessmen at the next table. One was an evolutionary biologist from the U.K. and a huge Richard Dawkins fan. His other colleagues were from the Netherlands, Poland, and Scotland. They were stunned to hear young men so passionate about God and the Bible and couldn't help but interrupt us to talk about it. The biologist was alternately intrigued and irritated. He couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that we actually believed in God. But he was not the least bit rude. In fact, we were honored by his persistent interest in us. The guys did a great job of presenting the gospel and drawing attention to God's Word. We left that restaurant rejoicing in the opportunity God gave us, and eager to pray for these men. It was, however, a sober reminder of how much of a culture gap exists in Europe when Bible-believing Christians are such a novelty.

(Photos: On location in Hamburg; a popular urban car in Hamburg; Wolfgang Wegert with one of the Dead Sea Scroll containers; a Bible dating from the early 1500s.)

May 05, 2008

Touring Hamburg

Img_5747We spent the day capturing footage of Hamburg and its residents. This really is an attractive city. We are slowly adapting to the culture, too--learning a bit of what's on our menus in German and how to read the parking signs. By the time we have to leave, I figure we will have learned enough to cease being a public menace.

This is a small collection of snapshots I took while we were shooting today.

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The top photo is the Rathausmarkt, which is the Hamburg City Hall and the plaza in front of it.

The second photo is of a restaurant on the Deichstrasse, one of the oldest streets in Hamburg. It dates from the 1300s, but most of the original buildings were destroyed in a 19th-century fire. Img_5761_2So these are largely the reconstructed buildings. But they are still quite attractive. The third photo is the collection of Deichstrasse buildings that face the canal. Img_5799

The next two photos are from the tower of the St. Michaelis Church. We went up there to shoot the city skyline in the late afternoon sunlight. One photo is of John David Maresco, enjoying the view. John David is the newest member of our team and may well be the hardest worker. He cheerfully carries all of our heavy gear--and my bag, too. All of the men on the team are gentlemen, but John David never lets me slide into being "just one of the guys."  How encouraging it is to receive this gentlemanly courtesy!

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The last photo is of the Hamburg skyline, facing the Aussenalster Lake, which in this beautiful weather is dotted with sailboats.

It's all "sehr gut" (very good) as far as we are concerned!

May 04, 2008

Hamming It Up in Hamburg

Img_5717Maybe it's the jet lag, but we've laughed a great deal since we arrived in Hamburg on Friday. Of course, we've been working the whole time but we've certainly found a lot to amuse us.

I think it started with our rental car. First, it should be noted that Germans have a keen sense of design in everything. We were duly impressed with the lighting, color scheme and overall space design of the rental car counters at the Hamburg airport. That was the first clue we weren't in Kansas anymore, so to speak. Img_5715_2The second rude shock was the realization that none of us could speak German--quite unhelpful when you are trying to read road signs. Eventually, hard-won experience taught us the words for key concepts such as "one way" and "exit." But the first ten minutes in the rental car were the longest we've yet to experience in Germany--and we hadn't even left the rental car lot. I think my nonstop giggling made it seem even longer because we honestly couldn't communicate with anyone. It's amazing that companies will just hand you the keys to an expensive vehicle and wave bye-bye to you without even the most rudimentary explanation of traffic signs and laws. But praise God for GPS devices! I have no idea how I ever managed international travel before they were invented. Img_5733

We are here in Hamburg to interview Wolfgang Wegert, senior pastor of the Arche Church, a Sovereign Grace Ministries associate church. He is a fascinating interview subject. He tells stories with such alacrity and wit. We already interviewed his son, Christian, who is a student at the Sovereign Grace Ministries Pastors College this year, and Christian's wife, Verena, before we left Gaithersburg. Wolfgang has a fascinating personal history that spans World War II, the Cold War, the fall of the Berlin Wall, and the reunification of Germany. He has been a pastor for more than 45 years. We interviewed Wolfgang on Saturday and then filmed the Sunday meeting at Arche church. Afterward, we joined Wolfgang's family for a cookout.Img_5743

On Monday we will be shooting around the city. I am looking forward to seeing more of Hamburg. It blends both modern design and historical facades in its architecture. One of our favorite places so far was an organic restaurant featuring "bio food." It was like eating Whole Foods cuisine in an Apple Store designed by a Helvetica fan. Img_5728 (Shout out here to Matt Wahl, SGM's creative designer: This place screamed you! It's what we all thought as soon as we walked in.) My picture doesn't do it any justice, but I've never seen a restaurant with this much attention to design detail in the decor (menus, placemats, napkins, wall art, furniture). And major props to Hamburg restaurants--so far, they have all been far quieter than their D.C. counterparts!

(Top left: Silliness in a self-portrait. Top right: The film crew poses for their new CD cover--Drew Painter, Andrew Gallo, David Altrogge, and John David Maresco. Middle: Arche Church. Bottom right: Gertrude and Wolfgang Wegert. Bottom left: The bio restaurant.)

May 01, 2008

Mission Video Season Again!

I'm headed to Hamburg, Germany, today with a top-flight video crew--Andrew Gallo, David Altrogge, John David Maresco, and Drew Painter. We are shooting for the 2008 Sovereign Grace Ministries mission video. A week later, we'll be heading to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia for the next leg of the shoot. We're excited to be on the road again. It's a privilege to travel to document God's grace among His people in different nations. So keep an eye on this blog for updates from the road--Lord willing!

April 29, 2008

Porn in Public Libraries

774276_library_of_lightA few months ago, I received this letter from my friend, Pam. It concerned a shock she received at a local public library--a new facility in Montgomery County that is a hit with all the moms of young children in our area. I asked permission to share it with my blog readers because I was curious as to what other people had experienced.

As most of you know, I am not one to go all hysterical, but I am so dumbfounded by what happed to me today, that I thought I should share it with you.

I was at the Rockville Library (without my son, gratefully), when I looked over and saw a young man watching pornography on one of the library's computers. I will spare you the details, but suffice to say it was very explicit and nobody with any sense of sanity would say what I was viewing was open to interpretation.  When I complained to the librarian I was told that by law--because of his right to freedom of speech and right to information--this man had the right to watch porn on the library's computers, and that all they could do was go give the man a privacy screen.  A privacy screen will block the view from the sides but still allow someone standing directly behind him to see what was on the screen.  I should add that there was a group of younger teenagers sitting within sight of this computer as well.

I had a lengthy conversation with the head librarian.  I asked for the library's policy in writing, and she gave me a copy of a policy paper that the American Library Association put out about internet access and the use of filters on library computers.  (The ALA is against them.) While sympathetic in tone, she stated that there was nothing she could do. As I was leaving the library, a second librarian told me that at another library in Montgomery County, the library was forced to reprimand a security guard who forced a patron to stop viewing porn on the library's computer. The guard thought he was doing the right thing (imagine that!)--that patrons were not allowed to view porn at the library--but it turns out he was wrong. When the patron complained, the guard was reprimanded.

Yes, we live in a world that has some how made what is right wrong, and what is wrong right. Maybe you all knew this already, but I pass this along because I don't want your kids to see anything that that they shouldn't. I am mulling over whether there is any additional course of action I might be able to take, as this seems so insane that parents cannot do anything about this. If anyone has any suggestions for me, I would be grateful to receive them.

Pam says she appreciates this library and certainly isn't trying cause any trouble personally for the librarians there. But she is deeply concerned about this policy. Afterward, she learned through some rudimentary research that the Supreme Court ruled in 2003 that public libraries do not necessarily infringe on First Amendment rights of free speech if they put filters on their computers, as long as they
are willing to turn the filters off if an adult patron asks. The protection of children was seen as a "compelling interest," she says.

About a month after this experience, she wrote a lengthy letter to the director of Montgomery County Libraries. A few weeks later, she received a response from a library staffer, addressing specifically the issues in her letter.  The library staffer indicated that they are "evaluating" their current policy and talking to other jurisdictions to see how well (or not so well) filters work in other community libraries. She didn't really indicate that the county would be changing its policy, however. "I am hoping to convince other people to write to the director of the library, as well," Pam says. "The response that I received left me with the impression that they are open to input, but I could be wrong on this."

I have to confess I have little reason to be in libraries these days, thanks to the 'Net, so I was unaware of this issue. However, it appears to be a growing problem. One librarian was recently fired from her job for reporting a man watching child pornography. A California man was arrested for viewing child pornography and police found candy, ropes, and duct tape in his car. And an investigative report by KGO-TV in San Francisco found "multiple incidents of people performing lewd sexual acts in public view at a San Jose library while viewing porn." Fortunately, I also discovered that there is an organization called Family Friendly Libraries that has taken on this issue and provides guidelines for communities that want to take action.

Is this an issue in your community, too? I've opened the comment function on this post for a few days to hear from you all on this topic. I would especially appreciate hearing from the librarians. (Comments will be moderated and, due to my schedule, will only be posted for a few days.)

April 28, 2008

Women Against Pornography

Radical_womanhood_web (The following is an unedited excerpt from my forthcoming book, Radical Womanhood: Feminine Faith in a Feminist World. It is from a chapter that traces the reasons for the female raunch culture that we live in today. This excerpt is about the brief period when Christians and feminists were in agreement--about the issue of pornography. Caution: This blog post is not appropriate for younger eyes...)

Hugh Hefner launched Playboy from the kitchen of his Chicago apartment in 1953. He sold more than 53,000 copies for 50 cents each—the beginning of a multi-million dollar enterprise. Playboy reached the height of its U.S. circulation in the early ‘70s, shortly after it came under scrutiny by the Commission on Obscenity and Pornography, which was established by President Johnson in 1968. The commission published its report in 1970, stating that it found no evidence that pornography caused crime or delinquency among adults and youths. While it supported laws prohibiting sales of pornographic materials to children, it also recommended eliminating all legal restrictions on the use by consenting adults of sexually explicit books, magazines, pictures, and films.

At the same time, a serial killer named Ted Bundy began a horrifying murder spree across the country. From at least 1974 to 1978, he sexually assaulted and murdered dozens of young women in five states, dismembering and defiling their corpses in unmentionable ways. Some say he was responsible for more than 100 such murders. He was sentenced to death in 1979 and spent ten years on death row before he was executed in 1989. He was one of the most notorious criminals in the 20th century—as infamous for the extent and severity of his crimes as he was for his law-student smarts and boy-next-door good looks.

While Bundy was on death row, another national commission on pornography was formed under President Reagan in 1985. Led by Attorney General Edwin Meese III, and informally known as the Meese Commission, this commission invited several prominent Christian leaders, including Focus on the Family’s founder, James Dobson. In the 16 years between these commissions, society and technology had changed. The VCR had introduced porn films to private homes, but the Internet was not yet commonly available. Even so, there was a distinct difference in the way society viewed pornography from the 1970 commission to the Meese Commission:

By this time, society had changed in several ways. Pornography had become even more available; a new generation of social science studies suggested a link between exposure to violent or degrading pornography and male aggression against women in laboratory settings; and new conservative and feminist movements were joining hands to attack pornography. In addition, the membership of the new commission was decidedly more conservative than that of the 1970 commission. Not surprisingly, the Attorney General’s Commission on Pornography, also known as the Meese Commission, reached strikingly different conclusions than did its predecessor. In its 1986 report, the commission concluded that violent pornography and degrading pornography (pornography showing the “degradation, domination, or humiliation” of women) cause violence and discrimination against women and an erosion of sexual morality.

Here’s the unusual twist: The language in this report of a “decidedly more conservative” commission bore a striking resemblance to many leading feminist statements of the time. What fascinates me personally is that I clearly remember this period myself. I had recently graduated from college when the Meese Commission was formed. In my women’s studies classes, I was taught the feminist position that pornography degrades women. I have forgotten many things about college, but the lecture about pornography is still clear in my mind.

The Porn Wars

Women Against Pornography coalesced in the late ‘70s out of several organizations, and was loosely led by feminist author Susan Brownmiller, who wrote Against Our Will: Men, Women, and Rape, and the militant feminist Andrea Dworkin, among others. Dworkin made headlines in 1980 for collaborating with feminist and legal scholar Catharine MacKinnon on behalf of Linda Lovelace, star of the X-rated movie, “Deep Throat,” whose civil rights they were convinced had been violated. Dworkin campaigned frequently on the subject, helping to draft a law in 1983 that defined pornography as a civil rights violation against women. The law was later overturned by an appeal court as unconstitutional.

Dworkin even testified before the Meese Commission and a subcommittee of the Senate Judiciary Committee, as reported in a 1979 TIME magazine article:

Perhaps the basic question is whether pornography really incites men to violence against women, or does the opposite—lets them sublimate their aggressive sexual fantasies in a relatively harmless way. The 1970 report of the President’s Commission on Obscenity and Pornography implied that it did indeed serve as a useful social outlet. But since then, at least one of the study’s authors is having second thoughts. Says University of Pennsylvania Sociologist Marvin Wolfgang: “The weight of evidence [now] suggests that the portrayal of violence tends to encourage the use of physical aggression among people who are exposed to it.” Backed by such support, Brownmiller and other feminists have every intention of stepping up their fight, hoping to recruit still more converts to their cause.

Serial killer Ted Bundy could have been their poster child. In the final hours of his life before his execution in 1989 in Florida, Bundy gave a controversial video interview to Meese Commission member James Dobson. In it, he stressed over and over the influence of violent media and pornography on his thinking, and on the thinking and impulses of the other men in prison with him:  “I’ve lived in prison for a long time now and I’ve met a lot of men who were motivated to commit violence, just like me. And without exception, every one of them was deeply involved in pornography—without question, without exception. Deeply influenced and consumed by an addiction to pornography. There’s no question about it. The FBI’s own study on serial homicide shows that the most common interest among serial killers is pornography.”  Bundy claimed he wanted to make this warning about pornography his final message because he had seen the mainstreaming of porn and he was concerned for future generations.

Opposition to pornography was the link between two groups that typically had little else in common: the Christian Right and feminist activists. For a brief period in 1980s, they found themselves on the same page.

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I've embedded a segment of that video conversation between James Dobson and Ted Bundy. It's direct, but not graphic. During this interview, Bundy talks about how you can find stuff on cable TV that you couldn't even see in X-rated theaters years ago. And this was 1989 -- nearly 20 years ago! Now we have Law & Order: SVU depicting sexual violence each week on broadcast TV. If ever I'm flipping through channels and come across this show even briefly, I am horrified at what they portray.

It's a significant conversation. Unfortunately, sin is nowhere mentioned. That would have made a stronger video, in my opinion. Bundy was a master manipulator, so his motives for granting this interview are questionable. But even if he was looking to clean up his reputation by shifting blame to the influence of pornography, I think he still raised some valid points about the mainstreaming of porn and sexual violence. And all this was said before the rise of the Internet and third-wave feminism's "porn-positive" ideals.

Books Worth Buying

  • Joshua Harris: Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is): Sexual Purity in a Lust-Saturated World

    Joshua Harris: Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is): Sexual Purity in a Lust-Saturated World
    Everyone struggles with sinful sexual temptation. Everyone. So what can you do about it? Josh Harris candidly explains how to untangle God's good gift of sex from the issues of lust and sexual sin. A great book for both men and women!

  • Carolyn Mahaney, Nicole Whitacre, Kristin Chesemore, Janelle Bradshaw: Shopping for Time: How to Do It All and NOT Be Overwhelmed

    Carolyn Mahaney, Nicole Whitacre, Kristin Chesemore, Janelle Bradshaw: Shopping for Time: How to Do It All and NOT Be Overwhelmed
    This is a short book with a lot of wisdom. At under 100 pages, it won't take a lot of time to read. But the eternal perspective on time management that it contains will be well worth the investment.

  • Dave Harvey: When Sinners Say "I Do": Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage

    Dave Harvey: When Sinners Say "I Do": Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage
    Dave brings a humorous and light touch to a heavy subject, creating a winsome and appealing approach to an important topic. Dave spends the first four chapters addressing the doctrine of sin and why we need to have a healthy suspicion of our own hearts and motives before seeking to address the hearts and motives of others. But some of the greatest "gold" is found in chapters five and six, when Dave addresses mercy and forgiveness. Recommended for everyone--you don't need to be married to learn from this book how to live redemptively in close relationships.

  • John Ensor: Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart

    John Ensor: Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart
    A basic, user-friendly guide on the weighty matters of romance and the roles of men and women. Highly readable, concise guidance on how men and women can find lasting romance and enduring friendships.

  • Timothy S. Lane and Paul D. Tripp: How People Change

    Timothy S. Lane and Paul D. Tripp: How People Change
    This book helps Christians understand the roots of problems that are bearing bad fruit in their lives. Then it shows how the gospel can exchange bad roots for good roots--and good fruit. A gracious and encouraging book for anyone weary of trying to change through sheer willpower alone.

  • Tim Lane and Paul Tripp: Relationships: A Mess Worth Making

    Tim Lane and Paul Tripp: Relationships: A Mess Worth Making
    I love this title! The mess is because of our sin and self-centered drives. The worth comes from what God is doing among our relationships. There are so many excellent insights in this book--I recommend it for everyone. Though we tend to think romance when we hear the word "relationship," this book addresses a far broader scope with graciousness and biblical truth.

  • Gary & Betsy Ricucci: Love That Lasts: When Grace Meets Marriage

    Gary & Betsy Ricucci: Love That Lasts: When Grace Meets Marriage
    This is the second edition of a book I first read as a new believer. It was the first book I ever read on marriage and its gracious and encouraging approach made an indelible mark. This revised edition is even meatier and more winsome than the first. Highly recommended for singles and marrieds alike.

  • C. H. Spurgeon: The Triumph of Faith in a Believer's Life

    C. H. Spurgeon: The Triumph of Faith in a Believer's Life
    This collection of Spurgeon's writings spans faith's sure foundations to what mature faith looks like. It is both inspiring and practical, and will revive the flickering embers of faith in any reader's soul.

  • Henry T. Blackaby, Richard Blackaby: Hearing God's Voice

    Henry T. Blackaby, Richard Blackaby: Hearing God's Voice
    This book expands on many of the principles found in Experiencing God, Henry Blackaby's highly successful book from the mid-'90s. It reminds us that we are here to serve God's purposes and not vice versa, so our prayers should be conformed the same way. The authors help us to discern the voice of God, to identify ways He speaks, and to respond to revelations of His will. An ideal book for those who are seeking God for direction and guidance.

  • C.J. Mahaney: Living the Cross-Centered Life

    C.J. Mahaney: Living the Cross-Centered Life
    It seems that there are many ideas that compete for the attention of single adults. In the end, what we will be commended for has nothing to do with having a 'successful' dating life, a great career, the ability to travel widely, or to own a lot of expensive possessions. It has to do with hearing, 'Well done, good and faithful servant.' This little book keeps us all focused on the One who is our mediator. An outstanding resource for any Christian who feels caught in the "performance trap."

  • John Piper: God Is the Gospel: Meditations on God's Love As the Gift of Himself

    John Piper: God Is the Gospel: Meditations on God's Love As the Gift of Himself
    This compact book argues eloquently that the good news of the Gospel is all the things we normally assume--salvation, justification, propitiation, new heavens and new earth, etc. But the heart of the Gospel is not found in the gifts of God but in God Himself. The good news of the gospel is the enjoyment of the glory of God in Christ. Recommended especially for long-time Christians who may need to be refreshed in the wonder of the Gospel.

  • John MacArthur: NASB MacArthur Study Bible

    John MacArthur: NASB MacArthur Study Bible
    This is the revised edition of Dr. MacArthur's study notes and commentary within the NASB translation. This Bible includes additional supplements on topics such as how we got the Bible, how to study the Bible, and the progress of revelation. An excellent personal study Bible!

  • Paul David Tripp: Age of Opportunity: A Biblical Guide to Parenting Teens

    Paul David Tripp: Age of Opportunity: A Biblical Guide to Parenting Teens
    Do you think rebellion is automatic in the teen years? It shouldn't be. Paul Tripp's book challenges our assumptions and shows parents how to make the teen years a season of opportunity, instead.

  • Mark Dever: The Message of the New Testament: Promises Kept

    Mark Dever: The Message of the New Testament: Promises Kept
    What a priceless Bible study tool this is! Though Mark is a superb scholar, his evangelist's heart is clearly evident in his accessible writing style. This book is packed with outstanding teaching but it is written in a winsome manner that is free of dense theological terms. The goal of this book is to present an overview of each book of the New Testament so that we can understand how it fits in with the rest of the Bible.

  • John MacArthur: Twelve Extraordinary Women

    John MacArthur: Twelve Extraordinary Women
    The women MacArthur chose as subjects for this book are: Eve, Sarah, Rahab, Ruth, Hannah, Mary, Anna, The Samaritan Woman, Martha and Mary, Mary Magdalene and Lydia. Each chapter goes into the cultural and theological background of these women and then shows how God worked through ordinary women to make their faith and fruit extraordinary. Highly recommended!

  • Nancy Leigh DeMoss, editor: Biblical Womanhood in the Home (Foundations for the Family Series)

    Nancy Leigh DeMoss, editor: Biblical Womanhood in the Home (Foundations for the Family Series)
    This book collects chapters from several leading women writers and teachers to address a wide array of topics concerning biblical womanhood. I'm partial to Carolyn Mahaney's two chapters on femininity and beauty, but I also highly recommend Nancy Leigh DeMoss's two chapters on the portraits of a wise and foolish woman.

  • Tedd Tripp: Shepherding A Child's Heart

    Tedd Tripp: Shepherding A Child's Heart
    Every adult should read this book, but it's a Must for parents. As you'll soon read in this valuable book, parenting is not about behavior modification--it's about reaching the heart of children so they understand their motives, their sinfulness, and ultimately their need for a Savior.

  • Sinclair Ferguson: Discovering God's Will

    Sinclair Ferguson: Discovering God's Will
    The counsel contained in this slim volume is timeless. Nine chapters comprise the book: God's Ultimate Purpose, Guidelines for Guidance, Guarding the Heart, A Christian Lifestyle, Principles of Conduct, Consider Your Calling, Marriage?, Wait for the Lord, and He Leads Me. The last four chapters are priceless, but they need to be read on the foundation of the teaching in the earlier chapters.

  • C.J. Mahaney: Humility: True Greatness

    C.J. Mahaney: Humility: True Greatness
    This small book packs a wallop. C.J. starts by showing us why God opposes the proud and is drawn to the humble. Then he illustrates how to cultivate humility in many practical ways. From chapters on The Promise of Humility and The Perils of Pride, to Identifying Evidences of Grace and Responding Humbly to Trials, this is a book of seasoned wisdom.

  • Randy Newman: Questioning Evangelism

    Randy Newman: Questioning Evangelism
    This book helps us understand how to ask questions of unbelievers to expose their assumptions about God and get to the heart of their questions--rather than getting sidetracked in our conversations. I'm still reading this book, so I'll add more commentary when I'm finished. But the fact that my pastor recommended it was all I needed to buy it!

  • Randy Alcorn: Money, Possessions & Eternity

    Randy Alcorn: Money, Possessions & Eternity
    Here is a comprehensive study of what the Scriptures teach about earning, spending, saving, and investing money. Randy is a gracious writer with a personal testimony of living what he has written. It's a big book, but well worth the investment to purchase and read it.

  • Randy Alcorn: Safely Home

    Randy Alcorn: Safely Home
    This is a fictional account of a Christian persecuted for his faith in China, but Randy Alcorn has done his homework. You'll learn a lot about the reality of Christianity in China through reading Safely Home. But you won't be able to read it flippantly. Well-crafted, well-developed, and moving--I highly recommend it.

  • Wayne Grudem: Evangelical Feminism and Biblical Truth

    Wayne Grudem: Evangelical Feminism and Biblical Truth
    While Mary Kassian's book (below) is a great sociological examination of the impact of second-wave feminism on our culture, Wayne Grudem's book is a detailed look at the claims of evangelical feminists against the teaching of Scripture. An excellent theological resource, written in a thorough yet humble manner. This is a life's work from Dr. Grudem and well worth having in your own personal library.

  • Mary Kassian: The Feminist Mistake

    Mary Kassian: The Feminist Mistake
    This book is subtitled "The Radical Impact of Feminism on Church and Culture." It's an in-depth, academic overview of the impact of what's been called second-wave feminism, spanning 1960s to 1990 or so. As a former feminist, it was eye-opening to read an historical account about the era in which I grew up. Kassian is a thorough writer, and her writing and research underscores one essential point: When you start by disregarding one aspect of the Bible's teaching, it's a short ride down a slippery slope to discarding Christianity altogether. A sobering read.

  • Arthur Bennett, editor: The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers and Devotions

    Arthur Bennett, editor: The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers and Devotions
    I once read that the public prayers of Christians today are anemic and repetitive. That charge may be true. If so, this book could be a remedy. It is a collection of Puritan prayers and devotions, organized by theme. This is one of my favorite tools in my personal devotions. I enjoy reading these prayers aloud, for their vocabulary and grammar force me to slowly savor their meaning. I am not praying aloud these days with the Puritan "thee" and "thou," but I do remember their concepts and try to incorporate their ideas into my prayers. As one writer here stated, "We ask great things of a great God." That's as true today as it was 400 years ago.

  • John Piper: When I Don’t Desire God: How To Fight For Joy

    John Piper: When I Don’t Desire God: How To Fight For Joy
    Joy doesn't just happen. It's a fight for most Christians. And this book is an excellent guide for both why and how. An excellent resource for Christians who have grown weary and/or rusty in their personal devotions.

  • R. C. Sproul, editor: The Reformation Study Bible

    R. C. Sproul, editor: The Reformation Study Bible
    This is the English Standard Version Bible with study notes from contributors such as Wayne Grudem, Sinclair Ferguson, Bruce Waltke, Graeme Goldsworthy, and James Boice. It's the version I currently use for personal study.

  • Jonathan Edwards: Charity and Its Fruits

    Jonathan Edwards: Charity and Its Fruits
    Charity is the old-fashioned word for love. This book is a collection of sermons from Jonathan Edwards from the mid-1700s. It's not a fast read, but it's worth the work to plumb the concept of Christian love as understood in another era by a formidable theologian.

  • Gary Thomas: Sacred Marriage

    Gary Thomas: Sacred Marriage
    Gary asks the book's central question in its subtitle: What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy? In this book, Gary looks at marriage as a spiritual discipline, examining how marriage is one way God conforms us to the image of Christ. Many of my newly married friends have found this book to be quite helpful.

  • Carolyn Mahaney, Nicole Whitacre: Girl Talk

    Carolyn Mahaney, Nicole Whitacre: Girl Talk
    This book, written by a mother-daughter duo, is for both mothers and daughters to go through together. It's subtitled "Mother-Daughter Conversations on Biblical Womanhood." I've given many copies away to mothers. But I've also heard of single fathers going through the book with their daughters. No matter how it's done, the point of the book is to disciple pre-teen and teen girls about biblical womanhood. It's an outstanding and winsomely-written book.

  • Lies Women Believe: Nancy Leigh DeMoss

    Lies Women Believe: Nancy Leigh DeMoss
    The subtitle is, "And the Truth that sets them free," which is really the focus of this succinct yet wide-ranging book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. Tackling lies we can believe about God, ourselves, sin, priorities, marriage, children, emotions, and circumstances, there is plenty here to challenge our current thinking and replace it with truth from God's Word.

  • Noel Piper: Faithful Women and their Extraordinary God

    Noel Piper: Faithful Women and their Extraordinary God
    This book profiles five women who lived courageous, fruitful lives from the 1700s on. Four of the five were single women, a fact that was not lost on me. A book that will provoke you to examine your own life. Highly recommended!

  • Elizabeth George: Loving God with All Your Mind

    Elizabeth George: Loving God with All Your Mind
    By going through Philippians 4:8, Elizabeth George teaches us how to think thoughts about God and others that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, and excellent. An excellent book for women who wrestle with sinful judgments of others (suspicion, insecurity, and critical attitudes).

  • Edward T. Welch: Depression: A Stubborn Darkness

    Edward T. Welch: Depression: A Stubborn Darkness
    Everyone wrestles with depression at various times and in varying degrees, and this book is an outstanding resource for defeating it. Ed Welch writes with such compassion and clarity, yet with firm conviction in the sufficiency of God's Word. Each chapter tackles different manifestations of depression and assigns helpful "homework" assignments for overcoming depression. The book closes with advice to friends and family members of those who suffer from more severe depression.

  • John Piper: Don't Waste Your Life

    John Piper: Don't Waste Your Life
    It seems that John Piper writes books faster than I can read them. This is one of his more accessible books and it makes a strong argument for living wisely in light of eternity.

  • Joni Eareckson Tada, Steven Estes: When God Weeps

    Joni Eareckson Tada, Steven Estes: When God Weeps
    This powerful book explores the issue of suffering. Joni writes elegantly of her personal trials as a quadriplegic, and Steve Estes adds a pastoral voice and perspective about God's character. Includes one of the most powerful chapters about the crucifixion that I've ever read. It will take your breath away--if you can still read it through your tears.

  • Jerry Bridges: Trusting God

    Jerry Bridges: Trusting God
    In the end, the Christian life boils down to one simple element: trusting God. In this classic book, Jerry Bridges writes clearly and pointedly about what we must do to grow in our relationship with God and to trust Him unreservedly.

  • Edward T. Welch: When People Are Big and God Is Small

    Edward T. Welch: When People Are Big and God Is Small
    There's a lot of talk these days about peer pressure and co-dependency. The Bible calls it "fear of man," which includes both being afraid of people and craving their approval. EVERYONE is affected by this sin tendency, and in this book Ed Welch wipes aside the murk and provides a shining view of God's grace. One of the most significant books in my life. A Must Read for singles!

  • Ken Sande: The Peacemaker

    Ken Sande: The Peacemaker
    When conflict arises in your life, do you ever see it as an opportunity to glorify God? You will after you read this book. Ken Sande provides clear, biblically-based thinking on conflict resolution.

  • Charles Spurgeon, Roy H. Clarke: Beside Still Waters

    Charles Spurgeon, Roy H. Clarke: Beside Still Waters
    This daily devotional features a collection of C.H. Spurgeon's writings on suffering, faith, and perseverance in trials. My copy is exceedingly highlighted. Recommended for every Christian, but especially for those whose faith is flagging due to trials or disappointments.

  • Joshua Harris: Boy Meets Girl

    Joshua Harris: Boy Meets Girl
    This is my favorite Josh Harris book. I highly recommend chapter ten, "When Your Past Comes Knocking," for those wrestling with past sexual sin. Josh candidly explores how to experience God's forgiveness, both to receive yourself and to extend to others.

  • Matthew Henry: The Quest for Meekness and Quietness of Spirit (Puritan Writings)

    Matthew Henry: The Quest for Meekness and Quietness of Spirit (Puritan Writings)
    It's good to read authors from different centuries, just to shake out the 21st-century ideas and tap into some timeless wisdom. Though this book requires some concentration to read, there is nothing else like it for learning to subdue your passions and cultivate contentment.

  • Paul Tripp: War of Words

    Paul Tripp: War of Words
    You know the old saying--women use WAY more words in any given day than men do. That's why this is a Must Read for every woman. The subtitle says it all: Getting to the Heart of Your Communication Struggles.

  • Paul Tripp: Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands

    Paul Tripp: Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands
    Have you ever found yourself at a loss to try to help or counsel someone else? Have you been too critical? Too impatient? Too disinterested? This book shows people in need of change how to help people who need change. It's a roadmap for grace when sinners counsel other sinners.

  • Paul Tripp: Lost in the Middle

    Paul Tripp: Lost in the Middle
    The subtitle is "Midlife and the Grace of God." An outstanding book! Don't let the "midlife" label turn you away. It will give you a Godward perspective whether you are tempted by a "quarter-life" crisis, "thirtysomething" crisis, or a full-blown "buy the Corvette and get a face lift" midlife crisis. A "crisis" is really just God showing us we've been putting our hopes into something other than Him. Paul Tripp challenges us to examine the harvest from our lives and not give up hope for planting a newer, more fruitful one in the future.

  • Joshua Harris: Stop Dating the Church

    Joshua Harris: Stop Dating the Church
    You may be experiencing a "lack of commitment" in many areas of your life, but there's one area for Christians that shouldn't be affected: commitment to the church. Not convinced? Read this book.

  • John Piper, Justin Taylor: Sex and the Supremacy of Christ

    John Piper, Justin Taylor: Sex and the Supremacy of Christ
    This book is a compilation of messages given at the 2005 Desiring God National Conference. In our sex-saturated society, this book is important for singles to read--not only because there are specific chapters included for single men and women--but because throughout the book God's glory is promoted and His original purpose for sex is celebrated without shame.

  • C.J. Mahaney: Sex, Romance and the Glory of God

    C.J. Mahaney: Sex, Romance and the Glory of God
    This is a Must Read for married men and those about to get married. I would even recommend it for single men who have converted as adults and who need to find a biblically-oriented guide to what God really intended in the gift of sex.

  • Carolyn Mahaney: Feminine Appeal

    Carolyn Mahaney: Feminine Appeal
    Many single women have asked me what books they should be reading in order to prepare for marriage--or even to better understand marriage in order to relate to their married friends. This is one of the Must Reads. Based on the principles found in Titus 2, Carolyn Mahaney addresses the virtues that all godly women (married and single) should emulate.

  • Carolyn McCulley: Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye?

    Carolyn McCulley: Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye?
    Of course I have to plug my own book. But remember, the title is a question, not a statement! The subtitle is the heart of the book: Trusting God with a Hope Deferred. A book for single women of all ages who want to understand what biblical femininity looks like for an umarried woman.